HERE WE GO PEOPLE! LOOK ALIVE. LET'S COUNTDOWN.Action? Check! 80's Van? Check! Criminal court coverage? Check! Microphone with station logo? Check! Mega perms? Check! Clip boards? Check! 3 alarm fire footage? Check! Weather radar? Check! Kick ass news? Check! Check! Check!ALL RIGHT GANG. ROLL … [Read more...]
Dear Internet: Request #1 – Useless Products
Dear Internet,Could you please show me the most useless product I could purchase online tonight?Thanks, Lance ___________________ Dear Lance,Of course. Here you go.Sincerely, The Internet … [Read more...]
Mustard Sandwich. Wanna Trade?
In Junior High, my Dad would sometimes make the sack lunches.He made the sandwiches he liked - which would be a bologna sandwich with Grey Poupon mustard and tomatoes. I couldn't see the tomatoes because there was a layer of black pepper covering them.Before you ask, no. No one would trade lunches with me. … [Read more...]
When Enormous Forces Use Cunning Knowledge In Nominal Grades Right Until Life Ends.
I am always fascinated on how bands choose their names.If I had a band, I would name the band in three ways:Method #1 Band name with one word -BUT, that word would have to be at least 4 syllables long.Method #2 A long-ass meaningless phrase to name the band like:"Time trails on a path that was never there" "Euphemism is another form of holding back the … [Read more...]
More like “Design Within Reach of My Trust Fund”
The store is named "Design Within Reach" Reach of what? You either have to be A) an executive at a company, B) trust fund baby, C) living the high life until your credit craters, or D) celebrity who needs to furnish a house for a magazine spread shoot.In order to recreate what you see on the home page, you could purchase a car instead with the money it would … [Read more...]